I’ve never won anything on the Melbourne Cup. It’s always a fun day for sure, except for the last five seconds of the race when you realise the betting slips in your hand are not worth the paper they are printed on. Personally, I put this down to backing the wrong animal.

The SKÅL Melbourne Cup Lunch has a slightly different approach. They race mud crabs. Sure, you don’t have some of the sensory highlights that come with the track experience—the pounding of hooves as the horses thunder past the finish line, the sweat on their rippling muscles, the sickly smell of spew on your shoes. There’s nothing like it, but mud crabs have something you don’t get with horses—winning!

The BNI Riverside table placed bets on two rounds of crab races. The first one, ‘Nuthin Leica Lobster’, didn’t go so well—in fact I thought it may have been dead, but in the second race ‘Chilli’ slowly bolted out of the ring elbowing a worthy competitor on the way past. (Do crabs even have elbows?)

Our team, along with head coach and motivator Oliver, was very pleased with the effort. All the training and hard work paid off. And, as is customary with mud crab races, the competitors were unceremoniously cooked up and served up for lunch.

And so, with 125 bucks in our pocket, a head full of booze and a gut full of fresh mud crab we staggered off into the setting sun to find another bar in which to bask in the glory of our Melbourne Cup win.

Videos

1. The photo finish. Technically the body of the crab must be over the line to win.
2. The post-race interview. The crab was well-spoken. Not sure what Oliver had to say – something about croissants, we think.

Click ‘read more …’ to view videos

The team is made up of:

• President – Melanie Waters
• Vice President – Geoff Kirkwood
• Treasurer – Susan Milicevic
• Education Co-ordinator – Chris Garrett
• Membership Committee – Bruce Pilcher, Cara Crundall
• Event Co-ordinator – Judy Briedis
• Visitor Hosts – Belinda Payne, Prue McMillan, Stuart Warren

Their personal profiles can be found on the members’ page or by clicking their names.

Thanks to Scott Hailstone and his team for all their hard work last term. The chapter is really going from strength to strength with two new members this week.

Strangely, the two new members joined after visiting two weeks ago when the chapter looked more like a set from an Adam Sandler movie. The previous leadership team went out with a bang with everyone dressed as his or her alter ego.

A picture paints a thousand words …

Compared with a visit to the doctors and a shot of Tamiflu, Judy’s method is relatively cost effective. Simply cut a bra in half (fuller, padded styles have proven more effective) and place over the head much like a gas mask. You can then relax while strolling the streets of Mexico or other exotic locales, reassured you are completely safe from any sniffles or coughs.

Judy’s 45-second infomercial however, is estimated to be one of the most expensive in history at an average of $1 to $2 per second.

Above: Nuwan demonstrates the quite fashionable precaution.